Are you ready to adopt a dog – let us help manage your expectations.
You are adopting a rescue dog – this is a wonderful experience and one that will be incredibly rewarding if you ALL understand the 3-3-3- rules and follow them (even if your dog is coming from a foster home). If you ignore them – you risk your dog being unable to settle and being returned.
What is the 3-3-3 Rule and are you up for the challenge?
In nutshell it is the best bit of advice any rescue can give to an adopter. It lowers your expectations and raises your ability to understand your new dog. It takes:
3 days for your new dog to decompress (relax, start to settle, calm down)
3 weeks for your new dog to learn your routine (the routine YOU need to teach him)
3 months for your new dog to feel at home in your home
In reality – and when you adopt a greyhound or lurcher it is a wonderful experience for everyone BUT and it’s a big but – only the humans know how amazing it is. Your dog just thinks he is on the move again – you are taking him from whatever life he knows and changing everything. He doesn’t understand this is just a temporary set back, then things will be amazing. He may be worried, overwhelmed, confused. Those feelings may bring on unwanted behaviour that the humans are not happy with. Reassurance is the key – getting stressed with your dog will make things 100xs worse.
3 DAYS
Your dog has either come from kennels or a foster home. Either way – he will not know how to behave in your home or understand you or your routines. He also has no idea what you expect of him. You have taken him out of a world he knows, with people he knows and although you may know his future is wonderful – full of love, cuddles and adventures – at this stage he doesn’t know this. As a human, it is your job to give him space, and time to adjust to his new world. The worst thing you can do is take him everywhere and introduce him to everyone because you are really happy to have adopted him. Your excitement and enthusiasm may overwhelm him and this may bring on unwanted behaviour. Give him space and quiet time to adjust – the exciting times and walks will come soon enough. He will not be upset if he is not walked for a few days whilst you settle him in – or if you don’t introduce him to your family, friends and neighbours, who are equally as excited to meet him. As the human – you are failing your new dog if you ignore the advice and decide your dog has to be walked – or say I got a dog to walk him (without giving him that settling in period). If you do this, you are doing what you want – and not what is best for your dog. You MUST give him a chance to find his paws, settle and start to trust you before you throw him into a new world.
If you over stimulate your dog in the early days you can end up with a dog that does not know how to behave – like a toddler who is over stimulated and very tired. They are naughty, stressed, tired, whingey and annoying. If you lower your expectations and change your routine for your dog (only for a short period) you will find a huge difference. If you have expectations that are not in touch with reality – you will constantly be disappointed in your new dog. If have low expectations – every little thing he does will make your really happy and you will see this as a positive step forward.
If your new dog is showing unwanted behaviour in the early stages – and you are refusing to follow advice – they you are very likely the cause of the problem.
- Greyhounds are very sensitive and not the brightest dogs – they are very easily emotionally overwhelmed. When greyhounds are returned for being “aggressive” it is nearly always man made, because the owners have created the problem with their lack of understanding. When we change the owner we stop the problem.
- Getting a dog from a foster home does not mean you get a fully trained dog so you don’t have to put any effort in.
- You need to start helping him to build up trust – remember your dog will not know you or trust you so his behaviour may not be the same with you as it was with his foster family. You are starting a fresh with him and have to start the 3-3-3 again.,
- You need to create a safe space for your new dog – one where he starts to relax and become a much loved member of your family.
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Do everything slowly – trying to rush the process may overwhelm your delicate sensitive greyhound (or lurcher). No matter how much you want to walk your dog – stop and think what is best for him – not what you want.
- Use a muzzle when you start to walk. This keeps everyone safe in the early weeks.
3 WEEKS
This is time for bonding and training. Your new dog doesn’t know you and has no idea what you expect of him or how much love you have to offer him. You have to show him this, you have to explain in simple terms what you expect by positive reinforcement when he is being good – praise him for doing the simplest tasks – even just coming back in from the garden, or going to his bed when asked. Be happy, be positive – do a cute voice, give him treats. Make him feel wanted, special and important.
- Far too many dogs are returned in the first 3 weeks because people expect their dog to be really grateful and understand what they are offering. They make it about them and how good they are to offer a rescue dog a home instead of gently reassuring their new dog and accepting things may not be good for a week or so.
- Greyhounds and lurchers are NOT aggressive dogs. If your new dog is showing any signs of aggression then it is very likely that the human is creating an atmosphere which is scaring him. He is reacting through fear. YOU are creating the problem. On the rare occasions we have had a dog returned for being “aggressive” then the dog has gone into a new home and has settled in without any issues. If there were no issues in the foster home (or when he was returned to the foster home) then we have to deduce it was the adopters and how they handled the settling in period. Greyhounds do not “guard” people – it is not in their DNA – if you think they are showing any signs of this – they are very likely scared of the person they are reacting to. Back off – stop any signs of human anxiety – give him space. Use a muzzle. It is all common sense but too many dogs are sent back to rescue for being aggressive – when they simply have bad owners, they are not bad dogs.
- Use the muzzle – don’t worry what people think., This is a great tool for keeping everyone safe and training your dog when introducing him to new dogs, children etc.
- Make sure everyone one is thinking the same and on the same page – don’t confuse your dogs by sending out mixed messages with different rules and expectations.
- If you don’t start to train your dog – then you cannot be surprised if he doesn’t listen to you when you give him a command.
3 MONTHS
It really does take 3 months for a new dog to start to feel at home – to understand this is now his new life and to start to appreciate his home and his new family. People give up in the first 3 months because they have unreasonable expectations of their dog and/or cannot be bothered to help the dog settle in.
- Give your dog space and a safe space if he needs it. Put what you want to one side – you will have many happy years of dog walking ahead of you. Think dog – not you.
- Lower your expectations – increase your patience levels.
- Make sure you dog has boundaries – you can say No and still love your dog and make him very happy. You cannot have to let him on your bed – then you moan he is on your bed.
- Your emotional and not very intelligent dog will need lots of reassurance – keep telling him when he is a good boy and always be positive around him. Greyhounds are not very brave – they like a human to run their life for them, so they feel safe.
- Don’t expect your dog to be able to think for himself – he has spent his whole life being institutionalised and doing what he has been told. He has never had to think for himself – do not overwhelm him. You need to take everything slowly in the first 3 months as you teach him how to be more independent.
- Take your new dog to basic dog training – this socialises him with other dogs. Training is the key to making everything work.
If you have anxiety – your new dog may pick up on this and become nervous. This may manifest into fear based aggression as he has picked up on your behaviour. Stay calm – have patience and understanding and give lots of reassurance – you will be surprised how much little things change everything.
If you new dog has fear based issues when out walking – then don’t walk him until he trusts you.
Think about your dog – the difference with a dog staying or being returned is usually the owners behaviour and not the dogs behaviour. Simple and small changes can often make a HUGE difference.